The Arts of War and Parenting

The 2011 Iowa State Fair ended yesterday. A couple of different days during the fair's 11-day run, Household-6, the kids, and I braved the heat, the crowds, the animals, the carnival rides, and the foods-on-a-stick. With Lena, now age 6, and Rain, age 4, we've moved beyond strollers and backpack kid-carriers. We travel more lightly now, if not exactly more efficiently.

In conducting our state fair maneuvers, I was repeatedly surprised how much Army techniques and tribal wisdom are applicable to parenting on the march:

• "No battle plan survives contact with your kids."

• Everyone in your squad should know the plan.

• Move in buddy teams. Always maintain visual contact.

• Conduct periodic tactical halts. Check buddies, equipment, supplies, and morale.

• Always brief a "lost soldier" plan.

• Always brief primary, alternate, and emergency means of communication.

• Identify rally points.

• Check fluid levels before, during, and after operation. Report all classes of leaks (I, II, and III) to a supervisor immediately.

• Know your pace count. Recognize your kids' pace count may be 4 or 5 times your own. Your fastest speed is that of the slowest member in your squad.

• "Strategy is for amateurs. Logistics is for parents."

• Basic combat load is one day's supply of water, wipes, cleanser, and clothes.

• Hasty decon is a squad-size operation which sustains the combat potential of a contaminated force by limiting spread of contamination.

• "This is my kid. There are many like him, but this one is mine."

• "I am responsible for everything my kid does and fails to do."

• "Never leave a kid behind."

And, finally, to paraphrase the ancient military philosopher Sun Tzu:

• "The supreme art of parenting is to subdue the enemy without fighting."